Are You Poly or Monogamous In Your Business Relationship…

by Reid on January 20, 2017

Diverse Business Team Discussing Work In OfficeHow do you do sex-positive business?

With Reid Mihalko from and and Cathy Vartuli from

Cathy: Are you poly or monogamous in your business relationships?

Reid: What? Business conversation. Sex Geek Summer Camp T-shirt means business conversations for sex educators. This is Cathy Vartuli from

Cathy: This is Reid Mihalko from and the Sex Geek Summer Camp amazing event.

Reid: .com. http:// Just .

Cathy: Not Amazing Sex … We were discussing last night when we were sitting in the hot tub drinking beers … We were talking about how relationships-

Reid: For the record, I was drinking beer. She doesn’t like alcohol.

Cathy: I sip some occasionally. I’m sorry. Did I leave that burden to you?

Reid: It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay. It’s a heavy burden.

Cathy: We were discussing about how different people have different business relationships. Some people want to have one partner that they work with exclusively and they never want their partner to work with anyone else, and some people like to have multiple business partners. I have multiple business partners. I work as an engineer. I work with Reid. I have a business partner Rick Wilkes,


Cathy: I help some other business people out, so it’s something that I do. That feels really good to me.

Reid: I am pretty much a benevolent dictator. I am a lone wolf. These are all terms … In the poly community, there are … First off, if you don’t know what polyamory is, it’s a type of consensual non monogamy that is based on being able to fall in love and not make you falling in love during your other relationships wrong. Whereas swinging would be consensual non monogamy, but more about the swinging and not … Falling in love complicates everything. In these situations, as a poly person when it comes to my business, I am more … What I teach inside poly styles, like what kind of poly are you, I’m more of a lone wolf and a benevolent dictator. I like being alone and then working with people and seeing people and then going off and being alone working with other people. What we were figuring out is in our work relationship, Cathy is very poly. She has all of her little dating relationships.

I am feeling like I am not collaborating or poly with other people, so unintentionally I feel like I am in a monogamous relationship with Cathy. That is generating a lot of friction and upset for me. Cathy is over there being like, “Everything is fine,” because for her she is dating a whole bunch of people in her business collaborations and it is fine. Until I get my world the way that I want it, it will not be fine for me. Then in us talking about my struggle, there was this, “Oh, I’m feeling like we moved in together and we’re raising a family, my business.” I’ve never wanted a family unit. Then this where all the “Agh” is coming for me. This was our big a-ha moment and we wanted to share with you. Now there is a conversation about what is your business style and how do you … ? It’s not just for business, but also this could apply to how you do projects with other people.

Cathy: We thought the concept was pretty clever to apply relationship advice to business styles. If this works for you, great, take it. If not, let it go. We’re going to come back in just a minute and talk about another relationship style that can be applied to business. It might give you insights.

Reid: Which one?

Cathy: Primary versus secondary.

Reid: Oh, primary versus secondary.

Cathy: Knowing your style can make a huge difference as you’re getting into business with someone or if you’re already in business with someone because it can let you know what you need to ask for and give you a framework to figure out if that other person is a great fit for a project, some collaboration, a full on business, marriage, whatever, they all see together which might be the equivalent of marriage.

Reid: We’ll also be talking about “cheating” on your business partners. Dan dan dah. Leave your comments. What do you think about your business style so far? Next video. I’m out.

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