Self-Love, Masturbation, One-On-One… How To Make It Special??!

by Reid on April 22, 2016

Beautiful Woman With Long Dark Hair Lying On Bed In BedroomBreaking out of the normal pattern can make one-on-one time/ masturbation more fun and connecting.

With Reid Mihalko from and Cathy Vartuli from

Reid: Self love.  Masturbation. One on one. I’m Reid Mihalko from

Cathy: I’m Cathy Vartuli from

Reid: We had an amazing person leave a comment, writing to us saying, “Could I get some more information on masturbation.  I’ve been single for a while.  I need some new tricks, some things to spice it up.”  This video’s answering that question.  What do you do Cathy?

Cathy: We can all get in ruts whether we’re in a relationship or not.  Breaking out of a normal pattern, having a date with yourself, can be really special.  I like to put on some music, some candle light, maybe take a bubble bath, and then I try to explore myself with new, without going to the, “Okay, I know that works.  I’m in a hurry.  I’m going to just kind of knock one out.”

Reid: Research, recognizance.  You’re checking out new territory.

Cathy: Yeah.

Reid: Boldly going.

Cathy: Boldly going.  I take orgasm off the table, at least in the beginning, because that can be a lot of pressure. Gently exploring, trying different kinds of touch.  Sometimes it’s really helpful to hear what other people are doing.  Sharing with close friends or…

Reid: I thought you meant like putting a glass up against the wall and trying to listen.

Cathy: If that’s your thing, get some-

Reid: Do, do, do, what are you doing in there?  That makes you make those noises.  Please help me. Like that?

Cathy: Yes, exactly.  Even if you’re in a relationship, it can be really hot to masturbate together side by side.  Just trying different things.  Imagine, if I had a partner, I would love to try this technique or can you do it for yourself.  Maybe it’s a touch, a different type of touch on your skin, see if you love that.  Just be present with yourself.

Our moods change day to day and we may have something that really knocked it out of the park that one day and so we always go back to that.  It may not be best for us on that particular day.

Reid: I’m a big fan of trying lube if you haven’t tried lube.  Trying different toys if you haven’t tried toys.  There’s a lot of really interesting masturbation sleeves and things for men now that we didn’t really have.  When I was a kid, all we had was a warm grapefruit and a shoe and a couch cushion.  If you’ve got a corduroy couch, well, well, you know how that ended.  What are some of the toys that you might be interested in.

Cathy: How did it end with the corduroy couch?

Reid: It never ends well.  Ribbed for your pleasure.

Cathy: Not so much.

Reid: It’s a lie.  It’s a lie.  There’s not enough lube for a couch cushion, let me tell you.  All right.  Enough of the too much information.

What kind of toys, if you’re a man as well.  I’m a huge fan of Flesh Light.  The company Flesh Light for lots of different reasons.  Maybe we should do another video on that at some point.

Then also, if you are someone who owns a clit, or even with a penis, because I’ve had some amazing results with my penis and a Hitachi Magic Wand or other kind of vibrators, vibratory devices.  If you’ve never masturbated with a vibrator or with sex toys before or as Dr. Ruth would say, if you’re old enough to remember who she is, “grab that cucumber.”  Then you want to try those things.

Also, for those of you, for who masturbation is mostly a front side genital activity, don’t forget the backside. You may want to work into, no pun intended, your sexplorations, your anus, your butt cheeks, try different positions, try different locations.

Cathy: If you’re always on your back, try being on your side or your stomach.

Reid: Or on your knees or standing up.

Cathy: Different locations.

Reid: Try looking in the mirror.  Try all kinds of things.

Cathy: I love the cucumber because you can actually carve them into different shapes.

Reid: You can.  I thought you were going to say, “feed them to your friends.”  Then sit there and go, “wha-ah-ah-ah-ah.

Cathy: You have a much dirtier mind than I do.

Reid: Yes, absolutely.  As it should be.  Again, try different things, explore yourself, really take yourself as Cathy said, on a date of sexploration and try to create new things and new routines for yourself.

Cathy: You might also want to check out, we have several videos on energy and being present and mindful touch.  We have some great programs on that too in his store,

Reid: Last by not least,  when you say you put on music, what kind of music do you listen to?

Cathy: That’s for me to know.

Reid: What kind of music do you listen to?

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