Why kissing in the rain isn’t necessarily romance!
Isn’t romance some story about a helpless damsel and a strong handsome man riding up on a white horse to rescue her? Or is romance Hallmark cards and flowers? Maybe you’re thinking romance is standing in the rain declaring your undying love… Ummmm… I think romance is none of these things.
As a pragmatist who doesn’t want to waste my time or yours, here are a few quick, illuminating thoughts about the R-word…
If you take all the hype out of it, what exactly is Romance? And why should I care about it?
Romance at it’s non-hyped up, music swelling, not a romance movie but real life core is: Creating a feeling of warmth and emotional connection by helping the other person(s) feel significant, valued, appreciated, and cared about.
Romance, to me, is basically all about leaving people seen and heard, with some extra warmth sprinkled in!
And there are some very useful tools and approaches that can help you create romance easily and powerfully. Use it only for good!
The Intent of Romance
The core intent of romance has been lost and confused by all the marketing, media, and movies around the subject. Society and expectation have created all kinds of RULES we’re supposed to follow to do romance “Right,” most of which don’t feel authentic at all, and a few that botch up the whole process!
The truth is, there are a few approaches that work for most people, and when you understand how to identify, fine tune, and customize them even a little bit, you can leave a trail of warm feelings and delight as you go through life.
Those warm feelings and happiness help “fill the tanks” of the people you care about so they feel nurtured, loved, and appreciated. Full tanks often means less jealousy, blame, short tempers, and lots more affection and sweetness! You get to leave the campsite better than you found it…
AND, you get to reap the rewards of romance done well:
1) The person you romance is likely going to have more love and energy to share with you,
2) You get to be a “Good Partner” who gets love and appreciation for doing such a great job in relationships, and
3) Since you’re such a good role model, your partner may start romancing ya back!
What is Romance and Why Does It Matter?
The neat thing is, if you learn how to romance a partner, you can also use many of the same approaches to “romance” (without the sexual overtones, in most cases) your friends, your co-workers, your boss, your family, the person in the grocery store, and even your cat!
When you “do” romance in an authentic way, honoring your own self-expression and the preferences of the other person, the dance you do can be rich and fulfilling for all involved. It can rekindle a spark that is burning out, open up connection newly formed, an revitalize stagnant and lethargic energies.
Are you ready to be the hero in your relationship?! Watch for my next email where I give you more details on how to create romance powerfully and easily! I want to leave you feeling significant and cared about, too!
xxREiD
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
once when it started raining heavily, i jumped up and grabbed my boyfriends hand. i ran out of the house still holding on to him.
Awwe, common Reid”
I have just found you and listened/read a little of what you had to say and was pleasantly surprised (and impressed). I was all excited to finally get a no nonsense definition of romance that I could share with my no nonsense spouse and it turns out it’s just email bait?! I was really ready to be wow’ed by you wisdom. I feel disappointed, but it’s ok. I will keep searching and observing, it will come to me someday 😉
Cheers and happy Brand building.
XOX
Would love to hear more about this topic!