Five Tips From Five Educators Around Sex And Relationship | Facebook Walk With Reid
Reid: Hello Facebook. It’s Reid Mihalko from https://reidaboutsex.com/. And today we have we have many guest stars today. This is like a variety show. So the title is 5 tips from 5 educators. Dave, you’re an educator now, but just for this video.
Monique: This will not upgraded
Reid: It stops immediately after we stop the video.
Buster: Yeah.
Reid: And I’m going to have, I’m going to have my friends introduce themselves and then were going to give or each going to give a tip for having either better relationships or better sex. You can all leave questions and we’ll check the questions later when we get inside and….and whatnot. So feel free to leave questions and just let us know what you think and as you sign on like say hi or hit some emoticons so, so that we know that you’re there. And also speak, speak you know speak loudly to the phone ‘coz I don’t have [Inaudible 00:00:52]. So, who wants to go first? Who are you? Why are you here?
Buster: Yeah, name is Buster RÃ¥dvik. I am a somatic psychotherapist working in this arena of Tantra and also trauma and relationships and sexuality and intimacy.
Reid: Yay! Welcome.
Buster: Yes, thank you.
Reid: Thanks for being our guest star today.
Buster: Yeah.
Reid: And the reason we’re not taking a….we’re not walking is it would be so hard to try to get everybody in the shot. Okay, so
All: hahaha
Dave: That’ll be [inaudible 1:16:00]
Monique: Can we pretend to walk for a minute?
Reid: Yeah. Here we go, here we go, here we go. We’re all walking, walking, walking. So who are you?
Monique: I’m Monique Darling and I love traveling around the world and getting to share tips like this in experiential workshops and that’s one of my greatest talents.
Reid: Okay. And what’s your website so people can find you?
Buster: http://embodiedintimacy.com/
Reid: Okay. And what’s your website?
Monique: Mine is https://whereintheworldismoniquedarling.com/
Reid: And that’s a legitimate question ‘coz we do not, we never know where Monique is. Who are you? Why are you here?
Rachel: I’m Rachel Rickards and I’m here because I work with Buster with http://embodiedintimacy.com/. And we do intimacy and relationship coaching and what do I say? I wanna say like up leveling. Yeah. Like up leveling.
Reid: And you also run…run events from behind the scenes?
Rachel: And I also run events from behind the scenes and festivals like Soul play festival.
Reid: Which is happening in a couple of days?
Rachel: Happening in a couple of days with all five of us.
Reid: Yeah, yeah. And which is sold out so if you haven’t bought your tickets Soul play is officially sold out.
Rachel: Too bad. But you can come to Intimacy Fest the week after with me Dave and Reid
Dave: That’s right.
Reid: Which is a great segue to to this this human being on the end who was like who’s like “I’m an educator?” I’m like you are for this video. Who are you?
Dave: And I want to say that that generally these introductions are not my favorite thing about about, about live videos in here and they usually like to make a joke or say that I’m from https://reidaboutsex.com/ or maybe like say something like that but I won’t do that. I will….I will give you a legitimate intro elevator pitch that would make some similar people happy or maybe able. But I’m I’m Dave Booda and I also run I run an event called Intimacy Fest. Where I’ve taken….oh my gosh. Look at this.
Reid: We’re having close Dave.
Dave: Come on in, come on in. Where I’ve actually what it is where I discovered that I had been to some events with Reid and I had seen how brilliant he was and, and I was like why is he showing up for four days and only teaching once? That’s stupid. Why would somebody ever do that? And so I said when I run an event instead of inviting a bunch of teachers other than like Reid and having teach over and over again.
Reid: And then you found out why they only have it just once.
All: hahahahaha
Dave: And it was brilliant. So I called this thing Intimacy Fest
Reid: Yeah. It’s like Reid fest event apparently.
Dave: Yeah. And no. It’s like Reid and Dave fest which is really perfect. So
Reid: Well, thank you for that. It’s a….it’s a really….Intimacy Fest is a really wonderful experience at a wonderful place.
Dave: Yeah
Reid: In Southern California. So if you’re curious about that what’s your website for that?
Dave: http://intimacyfest.com/
Reid: http://intimacyfest.com/. Alright, so who wants so who wants to give their first tip? One tip for having a better relationship, better sex. What….what your…what’s your tip? Who wants to go?
Buster: I would say for better sex, I would say the most mmm best tip that I can give is basically to relax once the energy has been consumed. Don’t be afraid of the sexual energy like lessening use that as a way to really come
All: hahahaha
Reid: He’s speaking up.
Buster: So use, use the pause as a way to connect and look into his eye and say, “Hi, there you are. How are you doing? What’s happening?” so you use
All: hahahaha
Buster: you use the, so as long as the power is going on then you can just connect and let that be the gearshift to the next episode of the sex that wants to happen.
Reid: hahaha… so, so
Dave: It’s gonna be a resort to live demo.
Reid: We just have to let everybody know. The…the sex geek T-shirts that I wear the printing shop is literally 50 feet from my front door. So, we’re sitting outside and they’re prepping the screens and they have to washh them off before the ink dries they need to the soak screen printing screen. It will it will eventually end. But I’m so sorry for the noise.
Buster: hahaha… No worries.
Dave: Two more to do
Monique: Okay. Let’s hurry and jump on me
Reid: okay
Monique: Okay, so the tip that I have is to continuously do self-work on yourself and it’s for better relationships and better sexuality so that you can really get clear on what are your needs, what are your desires and then be super ultra-vulnerable and speak them and then if something happens and that’s not being met, then one of the grandest things that I’ve found in my relationships is for us to take turns holding you and your disappointment, holding you in that space without trying to fix the other person so that you can really have more room and safety to be able to continuously look at and share the things that you need and want into a relationship
Reid: Thank you. Rachel.
Rachel: My turn.
Reid: What’s your tip?
Rachel: My tip is for both. ‘Coz I think you can do it for both either in your relationship or
Reid: And that’s and that’s the BART. That’s the San Francisco train. Oh my
Rachel: Or in your like safe sex elevator speech to lead with what you least want to say and then from there to invite impact from the people hearing what you least want to say and then allowing them to share.
Reid: What is impact mean?
Rachel: Impact means how does what I share impact you.
Reid: Oh okay.
Rachel: Yeah. How does my share impact you? How does that affect you?
Reid: Cool.
Rachel: Yeah.
Reid: Dave?
Dave: Come on, come on in here for a second.
Reid: Come in close.
Dave: Come on, come on in here. I’m gonna tell you, I’m gonna recommend something right here.
Reid: Wow.
Dave: So…so this is this is legit, this is legit, this is legit what I would recommend. And it’s relevant here ‘coz we’re here with these people here but I…I legit if if people haven’t like mass consumed the stuff that Reid is putting out, it is you know I will say this because I’ve…I’ve….I’ve said this to you before and and you you put out a ton of stuff sometimes that you know like your website and things it’s like there’s just a lot of stuff people don’t know where to like
Reid: It’s not organized.
Dave: It’s it’s not organized and like it’s like if you like going into like a thrift store that has like a hundreds and hundreds of fucking amazing things
Reid: It’s kind of like.
Dave: For like you know like two bucks I mean like there’s like it would be way smarter and you get the you get way cooler stuff than you would get it like in a department store. Like you’re getting the most unique awesome shit right? So I would like just genuinely recommend people like just mass consume the stuff that you’re putting out because there’s like there’s just no one else that’s doing like as quality of stuff and and me personally, I mean I’ve said this before but like if I were to look at like if this table, if this table we’re like up the pie chart of my like understanding about love and sexuality
Reid: It’s the dirtiest table in the world.
Dave: it’s disgusting table. But if it would like that I would like I could like section off like 70% of it and I could say that like Reid is responsible for like pretty much like most of what I do in the in the good way. And maybe there you know and it’s just like that’s you’ve just been like my role model and I just learned like vibe and all also happens to be have very similar tastes and desires so it helps like the…the path that you’re on is one that I want to be on too. But
Monique: I think you’re already on
Dave: Yeah. What’s that?
Monique: I think you are already on that path.
Dave: Oh no. Like for sure like we’re going in the same direction like I’m saying I’m like we’re both like slutty you know like dude dice or whatever right? That sounds right.
Reid: That’s d-u-d-e not d-o-o-d-i-e.
Dave: Like doodie is in the poop.
Rachel: It’s like, it’s like.
Monique: Yeah.
Dave: We’re not into like that actually. Sorry. Some assumption I should have made. But that and I also I also want to recommend Esther Perel’s three-part on series on audible like there’s an audible original podcasting her because then we’ve talked about Esther before and it…I think we all love her like her
Reid: Yeah
Dave: three-part thing on audible right now is free I think it’s gonna be like they’re gonna charge my passport soon.
Reid: Yeah.
Dave: It is fucking amazing.
Reid: Yeah. Esther Perel is really, really, really amazing.
Dave: It is like this shit she did on there, is magic. There’s, there’s a there’s three parts the third episode is called speak to me in French and she works with this couple and has them do some role-playing and one of the guy speaks French and it’s just the most epic beautiful magical thing ever. So I just really, really recommend.
Reid: Awesome. I’ll put that on the links.
Dave: Yeah. It’s awesome.
Reid: Great. Alright.
Rachel: What’s your tip Reid?
Reid: Never let Dave hold the selfie stick. That’s my tip. Never let him hold the stick.
Rachel: And clean the table.
Reid: Yeah. And clean the table before you do a Facebook live. So my, my biggest tip for relationships is say what you’re not saying. So practice sharing the scary stuff. Rachel touch on that a little bit. Lead with the scary stuff I think that that is super, super useful and important. Because there’s so much that we don’t say in our intimate relationships or in bed because we’re afraid.
Rachel: Yeah
Reid: And exercising that muscle in building that courage is really, really important you can go to https://reidaboutsex.com/difficult-conversation-formula/ and download the difficult conversation formula. There’s also an article there that you can read about you know how to use the conversation formula but sharing the scary stuff also has the….the double bonus of your role modeling for your relationships that they can share the scary stuff that they’re not sharing too. And when you are surrounded by people who share the things that they’re afraid to share, life might be difficult at times and you might have to process some stuff. But on the other side of that is a lot more freedom to self-expression just healthier relationships. And then I would say my bonus tip is hang out with awesome people who, who are trying to you know do the work to…to foster themselves like money said we’re capable of slowing down and understanding that sexual energy will ebb and flow and there are fearless in showing you the dirty table, and taking the selfie stick of life it’s a night of taking the selfie stick of life
Dave: That’s a metaphor. That’s a metaphor.
Reid: and and somebody you know and people who are in this a street Dave like you’re really courageous about you know and ravenous about ingesting information and content. So you’re you’re really a seeker. Yeah. I’m just gonna block myself up.
Monique: He’s always an implementer. He actually implements your work. Like that’s what I heard Dave saying is like there’s all this work your out especially your work and you’re actually looking at it and doing it, that’s what’s gonna change your life. If you implement,
Dave: I gotta say, I like to implement something with you
Monique: But you’re so good at them. I see you really taking all of this and then use it. Almost uniquely, it’s beautiful.
Reid: Alright as we bring this in for landing, where do people find you?
Dave: http://intimacyfest.com/
Rachel: http://embodiedintimacy.com/
Monique: https://whereintheworldismoniquedarling.com/find-me/
Reid: https://reidaboutsex.com/
Buster: http://www.embodiedintimacy.com/
Reid: Alright everybody, give us some emoticons on the way out if you would like.
All: Bye
Monique: We love you
Reid: Time to go back to work everyone.
Dave: This is work.
Reid: Thanks, guys.