Are you concerned about your penis size? Or love someone who has concerns about their size?
Join relationship expert Reid Mihalko from ReidAboutSex.com and Cathy Vartuli from TheIntimacyDojo.com as they discuss how penis size can effect people’s sexual confidence, and share tips on how to be more confident.
Cathy: Hey everyone, this is Cathy Vartuli from TheIntimacyDojo.com.
Reid: I’m Reid Mihalko from ReidAboutSex.com.
Cathy: Today we’re talking about penis size. (Laughs) A lot of people have issues about this.
Reid: (Crying) It’s too big! … This is serious stuff, because in our culture we make penis size way too important.
Cathy: Yes.
Reid: While it is cool, or neat to have a penis that you are proud of, because culturally speaking, it is approved because it’s large. I know a lot of people who like getting fucked, or giving blowjobs who do not like humongous penises.
Cathy: Some of them are scary.
Reid: Some are … Well, and this is for our people out there who have huge penises, that’s a burden too.
Cathy: Yeah.
Reid: Overall, joking aside. Let’s just take it like this; whatever you have is a blessing.
Cathy: And very cool.
Reid: And very cool because what we’re not talking about in culture, and this is a good friend of mine Nina Hartley talks about this. We don’t talk about how useful and important smaller penises are.
Cathy: Yeah.
Reid: Nina talks about how, particularly like for … She’s a porn star, for those people who don’t know who she is. For anal scenes and what not, she has way more fun with smaller cocks. For her, deep throating wise and what not, super huge, thick, girthy penises for her, not so good.
Cathy: Yeah.
Reid: Less girthy ones, perfect. In some ways, the idea is for you to understand whatever you have, there’s probably a couple of different ways you can be thinking about how to use it that is an advantage. For those of you with smaller penises, that can be a boon for somebody that you’re dating or in a relationship with, who’s never tried anal and wants to.
Cathy: Yeah.
Reid: But we get so much mixed messaging or bad messaging from popular media and also from mainstream porn around that things are supposed to be humongous. The reason they’re humongous in porn is it looks … it’s more entertaining when things are more extravagant. The Titanic!
Cathy: And they’re trying to let the camera get in there, so you have to be, you can’t be right up against each other.
Reid: Yeah. When you see a double penetration scene and you’re trying to fit two people with penises into two holes that’s on one person, longer penises are actually more useful in just like engineering feats. That has nothing to do with what you actually need to have one-on-one sex especially. With different body types and how people who like receptive sex, whether you’re a man or woman, or whatever you identify as. There are uses for everything.
Cathy: The vagina and the anus are … they can expand. They can, they’ll fit what is inserted.
Reid: For the most part, yeah.
Cathy: Well, for the most part, yes. The sensations are there whether someone is humongous or not.
Reid: Yeah. This is where when I talk to men and women about using sex toys, if you have a partner who wants a smaller or bigger penis, you can go out and buy it. Then use whatever you’re packing for whatever purposes suit the situation. Again, I’m not trying to say like in one video, poof, all of your cultural upbringing, and mixed messaging, and shame will disappear in one video. No. What I am saying is that what you have, what you’re walking around with from day to day, is probably more useful than Cosmo magazine has told you.
Cathy: If you go on Adult Friend Finder, or watch porn, you’ll see like everybody has enormous, straight, very conventionally perfectly shaped penises. But the average person, really there’s a huge variety and that’s really wonderful.
Reid: Yeah. Honestly, don’t be ashamed. Try to enjoy what you have and learn how to use it. You may be packing exactly what is needed in the moment my friends. Anything else?
Cathy: Leave comments below. We’d love to know what you think.
Reid: Yeah. Comments; short, long we’ll take them all.