Love Cupcakes? Literally… – Not Your Normal College Sex Week Sex Ed with Reid Mihalko

by Reid on March 27, 2018

Love Cupcakes? Literally… – Not Your Normal College Sex Week Sex Ed with Reid Mihalko











Sex Education can be hilarious! Sex Week and Sex Ed lectures at your school will never be the same. Reid Mihalko teaches Safe Sex on a cupcake at Stony Brook as part of his Sex Geek Chic Challenge College Tour! Invite Reid to your College Sex Week and entertain while learning savy skills.

Call Reid today about being part of Sex Geek Chic Challenge 2012!

The humorous, safer sex finale of sex and relationship expert Reid Mihalko of’s college lecture, “Non-Conservative Sex: From Fantasies to Taboos to Kink to Queer to Poly and More!” In this snippet, while dispensing communication tips for fostering consent and intimacy, Reid demonstrates (on a home-baked, chocolate cupcake) the proper use of a latex finger cot and physical techniques for properly and safely stimulating a vulva and clitoris.

Taped at Stony Brook College in February 2011, this lecture’s description went as follows:

“What is “out of the box” these days when it comes to sex? What if you think what turns you on isn’t “normal?” The good news is thinking about all types of sex and wanting to explore “other things” is normal and healthy! However, talking about our desires, knowing where to go for good information, and learning how to explore new things safely can be daunting. It’s not like you can ask your Dean or the graduate TA, right?

Join sex and relationship expert Reid Mihalko for a candid conversation about the “other” sex that’s out there. Reid will walk us through an overview of “non-conservative sex” as well as ways you can safely explore your sexuality solo and with others! Topics will include: taboos and fantasies, queer sex, kink and BDSM, open relationships, threesomes and moresomes, fetishes, masturbation and celibacy. Reid will also discuss tools to figure out what turns you and your partners on and tips for how to ask for what you want. You might be surprised to discover what turns your crank is more common than you think and that sex doesn’t have to be a shameful thing!”

Reid: So this is a finger cot, this is a cupcake. So tonight, never the twain had met. So this is how you use a finger cot. As part of photo opportunity, for those of you who would like to be on this little YouTube clip, sit in around me so you can tell your friends, “I’m in this YouTube clip where he molest a cupcake.” Come up and sit up on stage now. Gather around kids.

Audience 1: Don’t block by shadow the cupcake.

Reid: Yeah, don’t block the cupcake. And you can get behind me too.

Audience 2: And Colleen [inaudible 00:00:44] with cupcake.

Reid: So Colleen…

Audience 1: They’re delicious.

Colleen: [Inaudible 00:00:48] I ever said that somebody molested my cupcake on stage.

Audience 1: I want to look the frosting.

Reid: So hold the cupcake for a minute.

Audience 3: Wait, what kind of frosting is that?

Colleen: This is a chocolate cupcake with the one you can [inaudible 00:00:58] frost.

Audience 1: It’s freakin’ delicious.

Reid: Okay. So this is a finger cot, okay? You would use this traditionally like you cut your finger in a kitchen or something and use off to handle food, you know, when you bleed all over something, okay? You can also use this for digitally pleasuring something or someone. I also believed veterinarians use this, I won’t tell you why. Okay.

Let’s pretend… let’s say that this is a vagina. No, no. let’s say this is a vagina.

Audience: This is a vagina.

Reid: Excellent. You’re getting the idea now. Now let’s say this right up here is the clit.

Audience: This right up here is the clit.

Reid: Very good. So I, being a safer sex geek, because maybe I had a cot on my finger or maybe my partner just doesn’t want me touching them without a glove or a dental dam or something but I don’t have a glove but I have a finger cot, okay? Basically what I’m going to do is I’m going to take my time… oh, it’s kind of crunchy. I’m like, “Oh, honey, did you take a shower? A little crusty. Just get back from the gym?”

So basically what I’m going to do is I’m going to use my finger and I’m just going to massage… this is so horrible. I’m going to massage around the labia majora and the lips of the vagina, right? Now this might take a while for things to get nice and gooey… this is so bad. But basically now I’m going to massage the cupcake until my partner’s giving indications that this feels… I’m like, “Is this feeling good to you, honey?” “This is feeling great.” “Would you more pressure or less pressure?” “Less pressure, please.” “Yes, honey” “Could you just use the edge of your finger?” “Yes, honey. Like that?” “Oh, that’s really good” “Slower or faster?” “Slower” “Okay. How’s that?” “Ahhh… Ahhh…” “Now I’m going to do the other side, okay?” “Uh-huh… uh-huh… just like that… just like that”

Now when you’re touching somebody’s genitalia and they say just like that, that does not mean change. They really mean just like that. When they say right there, just there, right there they mean right there not switch to another area, okay? And then once my partner is nice and engorged and nice and yummy then and only then you’re going to move to the clitoris very gently. There’s more nerve endings here in a female person’s body and anywhere else in one concentrated area so you don’t want to flick it unless they tell you to because they might be a little kinky or just into flicking. It might not be kinky and I just like flicking, okay? So I’m going to use my finger really gently and be like, “How’s that?” “Ahhh…” “Would you like more pressure?” “Uh-huh” You can go a little bit harder.

Now if we’ve been making out for 15 or 20 minutes they might already be kind of like all yummy and juicy and ready but I’m not going to enter the cupcake until they’re ready for me to enter the cupcake because there’s nothing more annoying than just jamming your finger into a cupcake, okay? It’s not a doorbell. You’re not saying going, “How’s that, honey? Is that good?” Probably the answer would be no but you might build up to that, okay? So then I feel like things are rich and engorged and moist and yummy and pump. There might be a little wetness, hard to feel when I have the finger cot but I can definitely sense the heat and if I can feel it if it’s slick or not, might want to use lube to make things wetter because lube will sometimes create more sensation. “Would you like lube?” “Yes, please.” “How’s that?” “Ahhh…” Okay? And then put your finger right on the opening. Now this isn’t a real… this is a cupcake. We’re going to imagine that there’s an opening, you know, the vaginal opening, right? We’ve got the labia majora and the labia minora, basically the lips of the pussy. We have the vaginal opening, okay? The technical term is this is the vulva. The vagina is the inside part, the vaginal canal.

So what I like to do is I will rest my finger on the opening of the vagina, just lay it there. Just a little bit of pressure and be like, “How is that, honey?” “[Inaudible 00:06:15]” and then I might just kind of like use the whole flat of my finger and with the finger cot taking caution not to use, you know, have my skin touch her skin. This also kind of works for assholes too, not just mean people, actual assholes. Those are male or female where you just kind of rest your finger and leave a little pressure and let their body language tell you a lot like if they really like it they’re like push towards you and then you can… when in doubt and it’s always kind of nice be like, especially if it’s the first time and be like, “May I enter you?” that’s really nice. That’s how you know that there’s a gentleman or gentlewoman on the other end of that finger. They just ask. And then they’re like, “Uh hmm…” And what I like to do is like I go, “I actually like you to say yes or no because I want you to practice using your words.” Because some people are shy about that because they don’t know think they deserve to be feeling pleasured. “So, honey, I’m sorry. This is our first time. I actually need you to say yes or no.” “Yes…” I’m like, “Okay” and then what I’ll do is I’ll just very slowly and lightly…

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